The DUFF
Mae Whitman gives a fantastic performance in this sweet, funny film. Many reviewers have called this the next Mean Girls or Easy A — but it's nowhere near as clever or original as those two entries in the teen comedy canon; every beat happens exactly as you'd expect it to. Still, it's very entertaining and offers a great message to its high school audience.
Grade: B-
Fifty Shades of Grey
Surprisingly, this is actually a solid, entertaining film (though I was disappointed to see that the BDSM stuff was all rather vanilla). Fascinating, decently developed characters. Intriguing and complex exploration of female sexual agency. Dark and unsettling ending. However, some of the dialogue is unbearably cheesy, often leaving me howling with laughter — surely not the type of emission the creative team intended this work of erotica to induce.
Grade: B-
Focus
This is basically two separate films. The first part is a relatively fun, but empty, romp where Will Smith is a veteran con artist and pickpocket who teaches neophyte Margot Robbie the ropes. The second part is a dreary love story between the two set three years later in Buenos Aires and featuring a con so complex that it's totally incoherent. Writer/directors Glenn Ficarra and John Requa's two previous features were I Love You Phillip Morris and Crazy, Stupid, Love. — and both of those were very good. This one stinks.
Grade: D+
Hot Tub Time Machine 2
Unnecessary sequel that is marginally better than the utter trash that preceded it. This one is actually mildly amusing at times — usually thanks to Adam Scott, who (with his dorky charm and unhip enthusiasm) is a welcome addition to the cast, which is otherwise devoid of likable characters. Unexpected and fun cameo from Lisa Loeb. Rob Corddry plays one of the most unbearably loathsome characters of all time, and he's impressively committed, bless him. Screenplay is unfunny and idiotic and mean-spirited, but at least this one's less homophobic and misogynistic than the first film — though you understand how dire the situation is when that's something you say as praise. Time travel stuff continues to be gibberish, especially the deeply stupid closing-credit sequence, which instantly erases all the "lessons" these "characters" have "learned". With the title they have, these films ought to have been stupid fun, but instead we've gotten one of the most dreadful movie franchises in history. Please let there be no more.
Grade: D
Jupiter Ascending
The Wachowskis once again deliver pure movie magic. So much to appreciate in this film — jaw-dropping cinematography, costumes, sets, makeup, sound, and visual effects; Channing Tatum as a sexy shirtless man-wolf; Academy Award winner Eddie Redmayne as a campy villain; Mila Kunis scrubbing toilets. So many big ideas about human excess and consumption, but ultimately not quite that much to say about them. Still, this is a mega-budget Hollywood film that brims with originality and imagination and ambition, and that's something we should celebrate.
Grade: B
Kingsman: The Secret Service
Hugely charismatic, unexpected star-is-born performance from Taron Egerton. Film has incredibly fun cartoonish action scenes, delicious self-awareness. Strange, specific performance from Samuel L. Jackson, who is a delight as a tech-genius villain who dresses like Russell Simmons. Not deep at all, but engaging and satisfying.
Grade: B-
The Lazarus Effect
Disappointing horror film about scientists who create a serum that can bring patients back from the dead. Talented cast wasted on stale, predictable story. Uncreative deaths. Unimaginatively directed. Ultimately makes very little narrative sense.
Grade: D+
McFarland, USA
Inspirational sports movie about a cross-country running team at a poor Latino high school in California. Very engaging and well-made, despite it sticking entirely to the inspirational-sports-movie formula. There are no surprises here. (Non-spoiler: against all odds, they win at the end!) If the theme of Black or White was "Kevin Costner learns lessons about black people", then the theme for this is "Kevin Costner learns lessons about Mexicans". Costner (playing the coach here) really needs to break free from this type of movie and try new things. Still, this is reasonably rousing. Also: the teenage daughter is Dana Brody from Homeland. Ugh.
Grade: B-
Seventh Son
"I love The Lord of the Rings!”
"Yeah, I love it too."
"Let's make a movie that's just like it."
"Neat-o!"
"Do we have an interesting story?"
"We don't really have any story at all."
"Well, we have an evil witch-queen who can transform into a dragon. That's enough."
"Yeah, people love witches and dragons. Anything involving magic or fantasy. We should get a couple of Oscar winners too. That'll make people want to watch our movie."
"People also love when there's a Chosen One."
"Oh, totes. Should we make the hero a seventh son? That sounds important."
"What about the seventh son of the seventh son?"
"OMG, loves it!"
"We also gotta make this look visually impressive."
"For real. Design is important for a fantasy epic like this. What about the screenplay? I guess the actors need some lines to learn."
"Whatever. We'll figure something out."
"Cool."
Grade: C-
